‘Avatar’ is almost the best movie ever : Avatar Movie

“Avatar” is poised to become the highest grossing film of all time.

Earlier this week it broke the record for worldwide sales and soon it should take top marks for the U.S. market.And then, “Avatar” will replace “Titanic” as the best movie ever made.No, really. The film that makes the most money is also the best.

Why, how do you quantify the best movies? Do you use some pansy AFI list? Do you check the redness of a tomatometer, you commie?

Sorry, but if “Gone with the Wind” really wanted to win, it could have played on IMAX screens and charged $15 a ticket in 1939. That’s how capitalism works.

It’s why every “Star Wars” geek will tell you “The Phantom Menace” is better than “The Empire Strikes Back.”

It’s why animation fans talk about the revolution spawned by “Shrek The Third” and why it’s so much better than that “Toy Story” junk. Or, much worse, “Snow White and the Seven Dwarves” … whatever that was.

It’s why action junkies vastly prefer “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen” to the first two “Terminator” movies because giant robots beat puny, human-sized ones. Besides, Transformers can turn into cars and planes and stuff. Terminators only become governors.

Meanwhile, movie buffs will tell you “The Twilight Saga: New Moon” is a richer cinematic experience than “The Godfather,” “Home Alone 2” is a better Christmas movie than “It’s a Wonderful Life” and “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” is funnier than “Ghostbusters.”

But only $3 million funnier. If “Ghostbusters” had just swapped Nia Vardalos for boring, old Bill Murray …
And the glories of capitalism don’t end with film.

It’s why Hootie and the Blowfish are more talented than Prince. It’s why Dan Brown kicks the crap out of Ernest Hemingway, in a literary sense. And it’s why “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” is a better-crafted drama than “Mad Men.”

Don’t believe me? Fine. Watch “Citizen Kane” and listen to your Leonard Cohen albums. Savor a rare vintage of Cabernet while dining at a locally owned restaurant.

But when you change your mind, you can find me chewing on a Big Mac and washing it down with Coke in a McDonald’s inside a Wal-Mart that anchors a strip mall. And we can go see “Avatar” together at a multiplex.

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